March 31, 2001

ah shit.
I just realised tomorrow is april first.

greeeeaaaat.

today my day was spent full of doing nothing but thinking : and mind you I do rather hate thinking : but in any event : I woke up and ate the pizza from the now FUNZO day : which use to be Jimmoi day : and then I proceeded to look into a man called Merzbow

Merzbow is Japanese and is a pioneer in the music genre such as : Avanteguarde and Noise : in any event : his noise/music is actually very interesting : and he was influenced much by surrealism : however I wasn't in the mood for things that chaotic today : I just wanted something laid back : so I had to look around even more so

Which is where I found a band called Isotope 217 : my being in chemistry almost makes me want to know what Isotope 217 is : but I more-than-likely won't waste my time attempting to figure it out : in any event : they are a laid-back group with little-to-no lyrics : brass instruments : and bleepity-blips : overall a good band

After lounging around for awhile I then : merely because I felt it fit the mood and was rather even more-so bored than a bit before : decided to make some coffee : in which both Michael and I drank down from large jars : it was ok : much sugar added : as I abhor the taste of coffee

It reminded me of all the times me and Brice would have all-night coffee binges and waste our time hyped up on caffeine and make .wav files and send them to people online : that was a long time ago : in fact some old associates of mine still have wavs of us : how very entertaining:

So I had my lounge music : I had my coffee : and what didn't I have? I didn't have my bloody poetry : so to improvise I came up with a little bit of poetry of my own : a new style I've come up with : however I'm quite sure that someone in the past has come up with it : but all I do is take words and stick them together to make meaning for myself : the poem is as follows :

:spacious:luxury:sometimes:love:
:floorboards:behavior:england:sight:

:seeing:geometry:lifestyles:sexuality:
:energizer:mandibles:twitch:to the stars:

:pathetic:the circus:only once or twice:
:hello:goodbye:red heat:revolutionary:

:exempt:contempt:molest:infest:

:return:overpriced:silence:spices:
:away at the moment for life:

:pebbles:rockets:pills:and more:
:degeneration:fear:hate:regeneration:

:consume:purge:alive:never be:
:SATCOM:13442:jolly:counter:

:expel:hurricanes:wax:dirty:

:almost:
:but not quite:
:ever:


After writing that poem I then went to the bathroom : a number two : and came back into my room to find that Heather had logged on : I sent her a messege : but before I got to half-way through the messege she logged off : I cursed myself for going to the bathroom : and then I read my poem again : and then I drank a sip of sugar-coffee : and then I thought to myself that I should probably read something

I read the first chapter of Seven Life Lessons Of Choas : then read a bit more into Revolutionary Biology : then for some reason got bored of reading and went to www.bored.com where I found the website www.emode.com and took tests. One of the tests I took stated this :

You're smart, slick, and fast. You break rules. You start trends. MTV wants to interview you. You love loud, obnoxious parties where you can let it all hang out. No structure, please. You hate routine and boring, predictable people. You get cabin fever if you're cooped up too long — say, five minutes or so. But you adapt to new situations as smooth as butter.

You're open-minded, enthusiastic, and popular with both people and pets. Sure, you had bad hair in high school, but now you've got style. Everyone wants to be your friend. They buy you drinks and give you nicknames. But at home, late at night with the shades pulled down, you secretly question your self-worth, wondering if you're really all you're cracked up to be. Then you go to bed.

You hate seeing the same old faces at work day after day. But at the same time, you're a great leader among them. You're motivated and serious, and you always jump at the chance to take on a new project. Innovation and abstract thinking are your strengths. But sometimes you'd rather just work on an independent project so you can do your stuff without having to deal with people.


I laughed and laughed : and then told myself : "the only personality test that I would ever believe is the one that told me that I didn't take any personality tests seriously and thought they were all shit"

And then I realised that would be a paradox : and thought about that for awhile : and then lived on with my life listening to more Isotope 217 : and thought about calling Heather : but figured she went offline without saying anything for a reason

Ironically : I tried as hard as I could to show her that I had interest in her on FUNZO day : I called her twice [ unknownst to jimmoi ] from jimmoi's house when he was taking a poo : and I made him stop by her house where her father went and turned on the light and made me realize how very nervous standing outside someone's door when their father is glaring at you is : all three attempts at contact she was asleep.

Zounds. so I let her sleep : but I'm turning this more into a journal if anything : where was I?

Oh yes : so here I am : and in the time period from seven to seven fourty nine it has gotten dark : I was hoping someone would come over... I might go outside tonight : hopefully the clouds will be gone and there'll be a clear sky : with my luck it wont be clear : and it'll rain

I might still go outside anyway.

March 30, 2001



The Most Vile Thing Imaginable, Part IV




Well, that little lapse in the blogger server has thrown our little contest into a delay, hasn't it? But fear not, for despite that, i have still been looking around, and i have found yet another thing that ranks up there as one of "The Most Vile Things Imaginable". See, as your good and trustable friend, i have been searching far and wide for various things that are extreme vile. Of course, this last one didn't need to be searched for...it actually found me, so to speak.

One of the powerful things about the medium known as Television, is that it has the potential to do great things for children. For example, it has been well documented that the children's program, Sesame Street, has helped to lower the age at which children first start reading. Developmental Psychologists around the world have praised the power of Sesame Street and have urged that children's programming follow their suit.

However, there is a dark side to Television. While such old classic's as Looney Tunes, Transformers, G.I. Joe, and yes even Tom and Jerry, were by and far very entertaining, they have been criticized by a large majority for being far too violent for children. I suppose this is true. Last quarter i was given the assignment of watching a children's television program for 30 minutes to determine the levels of violence. My friends, the results were staggering. What i use to remember as a childhood favorite, Tom and Jerry, turned out to be a blood massacre of that poor mouse Jerry. Though even Jerry wasn't lagging in violent behavior. He committed nearly equal numbers of violent acts, such as dropping irons, forks, knives, old women, decripit ex-vice presidents, the Titanictm, etc. on Tom. There went a lifetime of happy childhood memories.

Still, out of all the arguments against children's programming, both on T.V. and now in theatres as well, there is something far more insidious that mere television/movie violence. Instead, the biggest problem lies in the life lessons that are being taught to children. The show that is most responsible for such attrocities is none other than the evil, vile television show: Pokemon.

Yes ladies, gentlemen, and gamers out there, Pokemon, that fad that should have been dead a year ago is still alive and kicking, and most of us want to kick the crap out of it. (I could have used a more explicit word like sh*t, but then Zach would not be able to read this right now.) I'm sure some of you are asking, "But how on earth could something as sweet and innocent as Pokemon be as evil and vile as you are claiming?" Simple my friends, very simple.

Pokemon is guilty for teaching our children many things. One of the most reprehensible is that of animal slavery. Yes, its true. Think about the deplorable conditions that poor Pikachu, or Gezundheit, or whatever there names are, have to live through in those tiny little "slave balls" that they are forced to reside in. It's inhumane. They don't even have little windows. And how do those animals breathe?

Also, it teaches children NOT to fight their own battles and stand up for themselves. Instead, it teaches impressionable young children to take their beloved pets and fling them at their enemies and archrivals. I can imagine a day when a little Johnny doesn't stand up to the schoolyard bully, but instead takes his pet cat Fluffy, stuffs it into a sack of some kind, and then flings the poor hapless feline at the bullies face. I ask you, is this wholesome American values?

Lastly, Pokemon is teaching our children that affluence is perfectly fine. It touts that it is perfectly okay to go out and collect as many of something as humanly possible, especially with their catch phrase, "Gotta catch 'em all!". Our country is already in trouble with the amount of money we needlessly waste, and the amount of affluence that permeates our dear nation, threatening to turn us all into nothing more then sloppy couch-potato shop-a-holics.

Well, with all this ranting, it must be obvious to you know that Pokemon is evil. But unfortunately, the story is not yet over. Apparently, Nintendo is now added new Pokemon characters and introducing them to the public through a new movie. This new movie, more vile and evil then the previous two probably were, will debut on Apr6th2001, and threatens to undo the fabric of our nation. This new movie is one of "The Most Vile Things Imaginable", and it goes by the name:Pokemon 3.


Gotta go get your mom and dad's wallet so you can catch 'em all!

Gotta grab your mom and dad's wallet so you can catch 'em all!


You know what the really sad part of this "Most Vile Thing Imaginable" is? It is nearly completely true...with the addition of a small character. Yes my dear friends, it is time to weep for our futures.

Good Lunch.

March 28, 2001

the world is 75% water.
hence it would be a BLUE gem.
that is all.

SCHWEEEE.
Well, I lost.
That is, my dinner.
Nasty.
I think we have a winner.

Well....to offset jEFF's contest, I propose one of my own


The most awesome thing imaginable*

Here's my starting entry


The picture is rather large, which is why it is presented as a link.

To further explain, this is a screen shot I took earlier on my mac. What you see is windows 98, running Rhino, inside a window in Mac OS. Virtual PC 4 kicks ass. So, by the end of next week, I'll have five operating systems fully opperational on ONE machine......Windows 98, Windows 2000, Red Hat Linux 6.2, Mac OS 9.1 and OS X. Each of the PC based OS's have 96 meg of RAM, which leaves plenty of the 128 the machine has left over for Mac OS. Of course, I can only ever really have two of them going, and one has to be OS 9.1, but it still works very well. (virtual PC would let me have all three PC os's running, but there isn't enough RAM in here to handle four operating systems running at once.

It works amazingly well, with a fair amount of speed.

(*to a geek.)


The Most Vile Thing Imaginable, Part III




Ah, yes...excellent. I see i already have a participant in this glorious contest that is "The Most Vile Thing Imaginable". I should say a couple of things real quick that should be said. Just so all of you know, candidates for "The Most Vile Thing Imaginable" does not have to be an image. The following list is but a sample of what can be considered for such an illustrious category:



  1. Images

  2. Concepts

  3. Sounds/Music

  4. Political Events/Historical Events




As you can see, there is quite a variety of fields. I expect that most people will stick with images, which is not a problem. But feel free to post about anything that fits as a possible Vile Thing. Also, just for your info...for some of the things i post, it might be easier to view certain aspects of my post by using Internet Explorer, though Netscape will work just fine for the basics.

And now, for the latest possibility as "The Most Vile Thing Imaginable", i present to you: Redneck Love.


Mrrwwaa...fat people make great lovers!

Mrrwwaa...Fat People Make The Greatest Lovers!


Ladies and gentlemen, i'm sure we all have ideas of what could be the most dangerous part of romance. Some would argue that burnt lovers, or jealous ex-boyfriends or girlfriends, or even stalkers (shutup jimmy), is the biggest problem. But dear friends i say that those are not nearly the greatest dangers. The greatest danger, which ranks as one of "The Most Vile Things Imaginable", is that of Redneck Love. Just look at the two lovebirds above. Now imagine of those two mated and produced offspring. These offspring, under current pressures of natural selection, would prove to be highly strong at surviving. In time, their offspring would eat our own offspring, not to mention the offspring of other animal species, raining destruction down upon our green gem of a planet. Even if they didn't eat all our offspring, they would surely eat our world's supply of food, causing world-wide hunger problems, like those seen in Russia. Just think about it.

Good Lunch.


The most vile thing imaginable

An American president, not elected by the people (as is possible by our system, of course) who is
obviously not running the country, but is still managing to run the country into the ground. He is not, however, willing to take responsibility for being the cause of our recent economic slump. The funny part is this: the people responsible for his being put there, republicans, are typically those who have a larger stake in the stock market. A republican in the white house is not good for the working class, as republicans have become friends with big business-and have been screwing the unions-but it’s the working class dumbfucks who put the fucking idiot in office. That, my friends, is the most vile thing imaginable.

March 27, 2001

I have drawn my conclusion of the band 'Einsturzende Neubauten', they are FUCKED UP!....I LOVE IT! I downloaded 146 megs of them today and realized how awesome they are. Though they do have their annoying songs that you don't want to listen to, they always will have those songs that leave you with a disturbed feeling afterwards (much like Boards of Canada's music from Twoism, such as Smokes Quantity.) HA! Mike and his 'Emotional Desensitization'.
oh no, it's a ROMH! "&" NUMBER 1 SEXY BONUS!


The Most Vile Thing Imaginable, Part II




Ah, that proverbial well that i had mentioned in a previous post seems to be filling up quite well with new ideas. For example, i have now come up with a note-worthy contest that i would like to talk about briefly. I call it the "Most Vile Thing Imaginable" Contest. It is genius, pure genius. Basically, it involves posting about what could be the most vile thing imaginable. Then, at the end of a week or two (more than likely it will extend for two weeks), everyone on blogger will be given the chance to vote on what they deemed to be the "Most Vile Thing Imaginable", based on the posts.

For the most part, i will be supplying the choices for the most vile thing imaginable. However, if one of you out there has an idea for what could be the most vile, then go ahead and post, and we will consider it for the contest. There is only one rule, or regulation, to consider: No Porn. Posting any type of porn would considerably turn off some of the readers, so therefore it has to be left out of the contest. Everything else goes, unless something comes out that is deemed unworthy of the contest.

That being said, i will now post another candidate for "The Most Vile Thing Imaginable": The New Batgirl.


Da da da da dum...Batgirl!

She scours the city in an attempt to stop crime, and then reports about it on Kiro 7 News.


No, your eyes are not deceiving you. That is in fact news anchor woman Susan Hutchinson as the new Batgirl. It wasn't enough that the last movie had George Clooney and Chris Odonell as Batman and Robin. Apparently Batgirl was so popular in the latest Batman movie, that they are given her a whole new movie. This one will be purely dedicated to the crime-stopping, superheroing exploits of Batgirl. However, it will NOT be Alicia Silverstone under the hooded cowl, but rather every Seattlites' favorite news anchor woman, Susan Hutchinson. This time, she will NOT only patrol the mean streets of Gotham city to fight crime, but to report about it as well. My good friend Harry Wapler, who works along side Mrs. Hutchinson, was NOT impressed by her new position however. He still fully believes he can "whoop her ass". Interesting.

Why does this rank in as one of the "Most Vile Things Imaginable"? Do you really have to ask? Isn't it sad what is happening to our beloved superheros? Next thing you know, they'll have someone like Nicholas Cage playing as Superman.

Good Lunch.
... the posted picture also makes a point :
that target employees will all be married : to people like that

and yes - even X-target employees : that means you jeff :
sure you think she's supple and ready for insemenation : but little do you know that in the years further on down the road she will grow to a size unimaginable : and will urge you to go to the store : the TARGET store : and to get her some "flashy clothes" that tell everyone that she's taken. oh yes. just you wait. and you jimmoi! one day you'll find yourself a hell of a woman : and she'll love and cherish and be interested in you : and you'll think everything is swell : and then will come the fatefull day when you get naked and she gets naked : and you turn on the light : and BLAMMO : you realise that without clothes on she's actually a 400lb spotted fat woman with natrual target signs imprinted into her flesh : yes : natrual : she will be the embodiment of target : and you'll be stuck with her : Zach : however : will suffer a far lesser evil fate : you see he'll go to college in missouri and have a ball : meet women : have parties : get drunk : yell at the cops and get thrown in jail for a bit where he'll meet a nice woman with semi-large breasts and : in zachs own words : DSL : in fact he'll call us from missouri and tell us about his girl's SUPER DSL : and time will pass : and the blowjobs and handjobs and footjobs and jobjobs and sex and buttsex and urethral-sex and sexsex and much-more-sex will be plentifull : and then one day he'll realise that his woman is a man : and that the reason his breath smells so good in the morning is because he eats target-mints, and that those weren't actually breasts at all : rather just red-marker circles and dots representing more target symbols desguised to look like nipples : and to think he sucked on those!

............. where am i going with this?
what the hell? shut up. jeez.
i am back. i have flown too much. my travels in the space of a week took me from washington state, to montana, to north dakota, to minnesota, to illinois, to kansas, to missouri, to kansas, to illinoise, to washington dc/maryland/viginia, to arkansas, to texas, to california(one stop at the mirimar naval training center, the place that the movie top gun staring tom cruise is about , and one stop in san diego), finaly to washington again. i am tired. and sick of the air force. and nascar. i decided on my college. its not in texas as i had been planning..its actually in missouri. yep. but dont fear i will be staying here most of teh summer, even after my family moves away. there will be some jimmoi day fun yet! im tired. bye


The Most Vile Thing Imaginable, Part I




Hello.

I have not been planning on posting for awhile, not necessarily because i didn't want to, but because the well from which i get my wonderous posting ideas and subjects for has temporarily run dry. That, and the fact that i have started a new quarter of interesting classes that are currently taking up a good deal of my time, and i am working toward getting a job in order to have an income of something, has also kept me from posting...until today.

Today i was bored and had five minutes or so, so i decided to do something i hadn't do in awhile. I started browsing around the internet and i found the most vile thing imaginable on Something Awful's I hate You website. Actually, i saw a great variety of vile things imaginable, but for today's Most Vile Thing Imaginable, I present to you: Target Woman.


Mrrrwwaaa....come to me baby...
Beware! Avert your eyes! Run for your life, she wants to mate with you!


As you can clearly see, there is something wrong with this woman. (Argueably, there could be something wrong with me for torturing you all by posting such a vile picture, but this is merely to illustrate a point.) No woman, or man, would ever subject themselves to wearing this much stupid looking target stuff, and then pose for it on camera. Now at this moment, i know at least Mr. Miller and Mr. Collins are thinking, "But Horehey, you have a target shirt...doesn't that make you hypocritical?" No this does not. My target shirt is used primarily as a movie prop, as can be seen in the movie that was made over this last weekend. Quite an interesting show might i add. Go see James for a copy of it, if you want to watch. Anyway, back to the vile thing above.

There is a possibility for why this lady is dressed like so. Perhaps she is looking for a mate and trying to make her receptiveness obvious. This would be the biologists/naturalist explanation for something so horrid as above. If that is the case, then any man who is within a five foot radius of her might want to consider a self-castration, as she will jump you and begin a torturous and rigorious mating dance and ritual with you, from which you may never survive.

Another possibility is that she is an employee, or married to an employee of Target. If this is the case, then she desperately needs Electroshock Therapy. Most everybody who works at Target does NOT want to be associated with that institution, especially on their off-hours. In fact, most employees often go home and begin an arduous task of scrubbing their entire body clean with a brillo pad. This does NOT always work.

The last possibility is that this woman is part of Roger Thomas' Target Porn ring. If this final possibility is the case, then we should all truly fear, not only for ourselves but for our future children's sake. Just imagine one day twenty years from now. You have a little boy, and like most little boys, he is trying to see his very first naked woman. Now think about what might happen if the very first naked woman is her... That's right. The world's gay and abstinent population would quadruple in a matter of hours. There goes the whole human race, since no one would ever want to reproduce, at least no guys would want to reproduce with women.

In total, i hope you take this threat seriously. When you think about it, you can understand why i she is the first of a new list of people i am putting on as the "Most Vile Things Imaginable".

Good lunch.

March 26, 2001

Hm...don't recall you having talked about it.

I went there, though. You can see for yourself. Here's my public transcript.
3.87 on the writen english, so far.
Not bad.
... looks like i might actually have to stay home today.
brice, being the total fuck he is, seems to be gone.

and uh. the bus is gone. and uh. my father, when asked for a ride, will probably raise hell and yell a lot. hence : i wont ask him. or well. i already did but he didnt seem to reply. hah. go figure.

was there anything important i needed to do today at school?

not that i can remember. i think i had a test in math. i would have passed it, and i can take it at some later date. other than that....

hum. nope, no biggie missed. as for this friday i will more-than-likely have someone drive me around looking for prospective job-opportunities. who that someone will be - i havent determined. anyone remember me yammering on about www.brainbench.com ? - well i went there, ironically remembered my name/password for once. all my old tests are still there saying i'm somewhat worth something.

my father now has his new system up and running. everytime he called from work he asked me if i was on it, and i told him i was not. and he was dumbfounded. heh. it is funny how things are sometimes.

oh. if you're curious what my brainbench certifications are then go to www.brainbench.com yourself, scroll down to View Public Transcript and type in the transcript #507437 .. and there you go! I dont remember exactly how many tests ive taken, but i do know i was master in something.

uh... yeah. well... hum. there really isn't much left to say.
I know you're expecting me to say "ouch"
but then again,
you probably know I'm expecting you to expect that.
so in retrospect,
you're probably expecting me not to say "ouch".

with all of this in carefull consideration, I've come to this conclusion:


ungh ;;;

heh heh heh.

March 25, 2001

March 24, 2001

Hahah hahahahahah!!!

I have the funniest funny funny in the world. My little sister got arrested! Hahahahahahahahahah hahahahahahahahahahhaaaaahahahaaaaaaaaaaaa! Now who's the perfest child now? hahahahahahahahah
ouch ,,,

March 23, 2001

So i guess you could say this is my version of the mega post
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH Im back at least until i get my comp baack from my friend whos fixing it, If anybody wants to buy a computer really cheap that comes equipped with a voodoo 3 or 4 i think and will run games better than what youve got now talk to me. This is mainly for james but if anybody else is interested im open for offers. Heres a glance of this story that im working, a little personal project of my own you could say. Its a sci/fi western type o story and one thing youve got to remember i banged this all out in like one night so it might need a bit ov tweaking here and there.This is about two pages typed so be ready to do some serious reading

Prologue

There was a time in human history when a great deal of the North American landmass was unexplored. To the people who inhabited the eastern section of the continent the west was a place that promised many a new life. This new frontier was to be populated by civilized folk who were adventurous
and willing to take the grueling mileage that was the great migration. But many events did not unfold the way the people had planned them to. The west was a harsh place and sometimes to survive men had to do what was needed, though it was not always the best and most legal of choices. And so in the great west existed a state of lawlessness for many years. Outlaws and bandits roamed the plains glorified in the daily papers and risen to the status of legend or hero in the eyes of children. The Law was unorganized and scattered. Only the ownership of a trusty Winchester or Colt gave the people a sense of security. But through the passage of time the west was tamed and the outlaw spirit quietly faded into obscurity.
Fast-forward many years later to mankind’s first contact with extraterrestrial life. These beings gave to us the secret of intergalactic travel and brought about an awakening of the human spirit. For the first time since the days of the great west man had a gift that offered an overcrowded planet a chance to give it self some serious leg room. But the arise of this new frontier rekindled an old flame in the human psyche that had been in danger of extinguishing forever. And on that day of June 4, 2055 the outlaw spirit was reborn. So bandits once again roamed multiple frontiers on countless worlds, and humans realized theirs was not the only species whose spirits contained the essence of the old west. With each new species they encountered there were discovered traces of the behavior known as “Wild-Westinitis” that had been adapted into the cultures of the different species. For Example, the benevolent, yet ill tempered Ja-rul species whose half-canine/half-reptilian steeds remind many of horses of previous millennia. Also the reptilian Baidock’s whose steely facial features and lightning fast reflexes make them excellent quick-draws compared to humans who present only few rivals. These species though quick to anger, are humanities allies with whom trade has flourished and interplanetary friendship blossoms. But these are only two examples of what humanity has encountered amongst the cosmos. Other races that are less than friendly but can still be trusted and some that are just downright ornery and hateful towards humans exist amongst the stars. Some intelligent, some with only basic intelligence and others driven purely by instinct to breed and kill at the will of the hive mind. And so amongst this group of alien hombres humanity has had to learn to adapt, to once again return to a time when a fast draw and a gunman’s disposition were dominant. Now the story of the frontier is played out on a much grander and larger arena…..
THE UNIVERSE.

My name is Jed Xanadu. Born to parents of different race I was called names like half-breed my entire life. My father was Baidock and my mother genuine human. Thank whatever god is listening that human genes are very dominant so I’m more or less normal looking but I do have a few added abilities that your average run of the mill terran doesn’t come equipped with. I am an outlaw. A real badass if I do say so myself, though I wasn’t always this way. Up until about three years ago I was just a boardroom lackey with a bad attitude. But I guess three years can change a man. And you could say I’m living proof of that. I used to have it all, money, power, but it was all taken away from me in one fell swoop by the employers in whom I placed a great deal of trust. This is my story.
I worked for a small corporation based on one of the planet Baidosa Prime’s smaller moons. The company was involved in deep core mining of a mineral that was 10 times as efficient as uranium but had less than half the radiation level. They called it Zarbanite. All of my problems started when I discovered plans that my company was stealing Top secret government data on prototypes of experimental weapons and was selling them to the highest bidder. When I told my boss about my intention to go public he calmly gave me that whole speech about “company loyalty” and how I’d be giving up a prestigious position if I were to make such a mistake. When I still wouldn’t guarantee my silence he he seemed to realize his defeat and told me to “git out of his office” and that I had a half hour to clean out my desk. Great way to end a week.
On my way out to my car I met up with what I presumed was the boss’s last ditch attempt to insure my being quiet about it all. The only way you could describe these goons was big and ugly. The one to my left was Baidock, probably a mercenary of some sort. Though he looked a little small for a Baidock he certainly made up for it on the intimidation scale. He was about 4’7 and built like a rock. His mouth was pulled up in a toothy snarl and I noticed that he was missing quite a few teeth. Now imagine the face of an Iguana with several scars running in odd patterns around his face and you’ve got the perfect image of our pal shorty. On the other hand his partner was a sight to be seen. Standing at a massive 7’4 was a member of the Daijuh species. These guys aren’t the brightest things on two legs and he demonstrated his stupidity by pointing an unloaded lazer pistol at me. It was then that I realized that this was gonna be a little tricky when “shorty” pulled out his own blaster and spoke in a high raspy tone.
“Are youss the one bossss callss Jeb?” This was strictly for effect as I could tell he knew exactly who I was.
I stared blankly at him for a moment then continued to walk towards my car.
“Ssspeak or we ssshall be forcssed to shoot.”
I opened the trunk of my crusier then turned to him, “Well we wouldn’t want that now would we lizard breath?”
He quickly said something to his partner and as he spoke I began to employ one of my few blessings. Using the power of my mind I reached out and visualized the big guy getting tossed through the air. They were taken completely by surprise as the Daijuh was picked up by some unseen force and hurled against a far wall.
The lizard barely had time to begin firing, as I had already started sprinting towards the still form of the giant. It wasn’t until I had reached the unconscious behemoth and picked up his gun did the shots start ringing aloud in the tiny parking garage.
Firing like there was no tomorrow (and missing like it was the day after) the overgrown chameleon shouted, “Youss different from normal humanss I’m gonna have fun with youss.”


Fuck with me

That’s an 18 inch DYE "Boom Stick" barrel.
Touted as the most accurate barrel on the market.
Below it is the factory 8 inch. Visible also is the N2/compressed air tank.
It’s one bad MOFO.

So, next time we go out,
fuck with me.
Please.

NASCAR is exciting as a spectator sport only because of the vast quantities of beer that are consumed by those who watch it.
Bingo. You hit the nail on the head there, Zach. And you have my sincerest condolences as to your current situation. That would be like moving to Tenino (the reason I point out Tenino is that it has a NASCAR track, the South Sound Speedway)

hmmm... they are making movies out of Tolkien’s Lord of the Rings trilogy. First one comes out this December, followed by the second part December 2002, and the finally December 2003. Judging by the trailer (I’ll post a link later) they are doing a wonderful job with the special effects. We’ll see though.

What else.......

Oh, yeah, it’s Friday, just in time. So far this week has had four Mondays, and I doubt today will be any different, but at least I don’t have to do it again tomorrow.

Well as a parting note, Outpost.com has 256meg DIMMs of PC-100 RAM for $90, as does Egghead.com. Two months ago, that same price would only get you 64meg. So I think I’ll get two, one for the Mac, one for the pc, and if the logic board the PC has can’t use that type (the manual is a very poor translation from Korean, so it’s not very clear what memory arrangements work) then my mac will get a half a gig of ram.....

That is all.

March 22, 2001

porn warzz are over? dammit i didnt even get to jpin teh fight. oh well. we looked at 14 different houses here today. about 9 were the exact same damn house, with a different paint job. one was eally rad..two were live-in-able. this town soo fuking sucks. i am glad i will never live here. its readneck heaven. i mean for teh love of god, there is a NASCAR track 5 miles outside of town!!!!!!!!!! NASCAR!!!! i mean..how whit trash redneck fucking hick shit can you get as NASCAR!!!!!!!! yeeeeeeeeeeee-haaaaaaawwwwwww cars drivin a big'ol circle!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
my gameboy and my cd player are keeping me alive. i made it to level 17 today before i got distracted and lost.yay. i have to go now. house rules.......its 2 am here..............
~zach~
Keeping the Faith


Goodday everybody. I realize that i haven't posted in awhile, but there are reasons for that. Currently i am hard at work learning several new tricks. I am also learning the fine art of webpage designing and whatnot. All of this new knowledge is going toward my MEGApost, which i have not forgotten about. In fact, i have found a new direction for it, which involves and affects a great number of you viewers.

Other than that, this will have to remain a comparibly short post. I might see some of you tomorrow as i am coming down later in the afternoon to hang out with jimmy and james and andy. Apparently they are having some get together at james' for a bit, which works perfectly because i am NOT spending money tomorrow.

I have to save up for this quarter at college. Also, there is a high chance i will be getting a job with WashPIRG, an environmental activist group of some kind. All i know for sure right now is that they pay 325-500 dollars a week. Nice.
...


he sure doesn't look like he's unhappy being green.

wtf?


hardy-har-har.

March 21, 2001

what no porn? NOOOOOOOOOOOOO! thats cheap. i wasnt even given the chance to counterattack. argh! i had some beastiality and buttsex too. gosh darnit. anywhoo-my mom is eating crackers that are tasteless...i ask if they were jewish crackers-she said there were german, than i said-"so...there jewish crackers?" she didnt get it.

so zach is alive-hisbackward talking brother didnt curse him to die as predicted. damn. yippee that hes alive, damn that my predictions are not comming true.

anywhoo-i have nother fun to say. james-am i picking you up from school on friday? we can get piza, rent games/movies/whatnot. just a thought. and has andy invited himself to your lan partai superextrodenair yet? and any word form jeff? BUTTSEX! I CANT PUT BUTTSEX ON THE BOARD! GUH!


moment of zen? why not.


I WIN PORN WARZZZZZZ


as i obviously pissed people off before jimmoi did. and to think that you all were offended by that when the deliberations between me, jimmoi and zach included : and not to say in the least : DONKEY DIAREAHEA ANAL SEX ..... heh. i hadn't thought that what i posted was that graphic... in fact - if you scroll down you'll see they've actually been CENSORED by THE MAN ... the man being me.

so - to make it official : since i never seemed to pay any attention to 'rules and regulations' in the first place : no pornography is to be posted... whee-deedile-dum .... so i guess i'll have to keep my PORN MOCKERY FUN JOKES to myself and sending them to jimmoi... hur hur hur... ITS A WATERMELON!

oh. i bought heather's gift today... i'm not suppose to say how much i paid for it... however, lets just say it has four digits of fun happy $$ in it. OooOooooh yeeeaaah.

anywho. sorry if you were offended. look down. you'll see you've won.
... this time.

CURSE YOU BUZZ LIGHTYEAR!!!!
Heh heh heh. got my paintball gun yesterday, as well as a copy of windoze 2000 pro. So I was busy installing.
The sniper barrel for the gun is on backorder, though, so if it doesn't come in soon you all may stand a chance when we go out.

jesse
You can customize the Mac OS interface, and Mac OS operations, just as much as win9x. You just have to know how.
It’s also quite a bit more stable and less prone to corruption when it does crash.
Why I switched-(1)I saw how well Mac does on a day-to-day basis, in a real world environment
(2)I need to know it inside and out to work on it, and if I can't work on it then my job becomes more difficult.
(3)Their hardware is better. Their processors are faster. Hands down.

I didn't abandon PC's, or even microsuck (still use orifice) but I did move on. Mac OS is just easier to use for everyday tasks (email, internet, word processing and the like), and for anything else it isn’t much more difficult to use.
It does have its drawbacks, and they are glaring, but the benefits do outweigh them. With Virtual PC, you don’t need a PC at all, you can run any PC operating system on a Mac, and even an old G3 (the first on, I don’t know the speed) with 128meg of RAM will run 98 and NT faster than a 233mhz pentium II with the same memory. Imagine a 733 MHz G4 with half a gig. The data processing rate on that would be about double that of a 1 gig Athlon or PIII (the P4 doesn’t count-it sucks) so even with virtual pc running it would still be faster (and the G4 towers have both PCI and AGP slots)

Now imagine this-later this year they are releasing a 1gig G4, and sometime next year a G5. All at 128bit or better (I’ve heard rumors of a 256bit processor, and other rumors linking that to the G5, but I doubt it so soon)

Ok enough of that. And enough with the porn, it’s amusing but I think you’ve offended some people.

Ok then later.

hey everyone.....i am just here to let you know that minot north dakota is one of teh five lamest places in america. actually so is ft levanworth kansas..which is where i am right now. yesterday and today have sucked. yesterday i spent all day flying in some lame airforce plane stopping at remote air bases. today....i spent the day riding metros in starnge cities, and driving in crampt rental cars. in am writing this right now from teh home of one of my dads army buddies. its sooooo bring here..and i cant find any chicks. well i guess that is all for now. the seattle trip was.......more of a learning experience than anything else..taht is how i will put it. the fact tha twe returned alive is a testament to our manliness and cool ratio. we are conquerors..and all that hokus pokus..........well i dont know how often i will be able to get on this..i will try to blogg once in a while the next couple of days. talk to you people later,
~zach~

March 20, 2001

I am never coming here again. Porn wars have gone far beyond the realms of taste.
& if you thought the moment of Ben wasnt enough


Ung Ung Ung OOoomf UofoOOmf


From that day on, Tweety was never the same...





Just going out to get some groceries .. dum de dum.


Sometimes a banana ISNT just a banana...


and now for your moment of Ben ...

WHOO YEAH.


hee hee hee. doesnt she just scream "hey babeh!"


i just love animated porno-gifs.
yea-you guys and your computer talking. its just like in that movie caddy shack. dont you know anything bradbury-its all about the stuff and the stuff-ya know, you read the post. its like caddyshack!.


click here to see this picture


anywho-i ate enchaladas...yummy. i wish i can draw like james-he is sooo soooo talented. eh?

anyway-i havent posted in a while...so this is odd.

there was no mention of the seattle trip-because nothing FUN happened. yea.
PUNK IS DEAD.
uh-im talking to some gothic girl online thats complaining about stomach pains due to PREGNANCY PILLS...i laughed.

anywhoo-heres you moment of zen. cyclope 45 is me.

GuysSchmuys: so what's all this about punk being dead? explain that to me, zach has said that on his page too
cyclope45: because it is/
cyclope45: its now...
cyclope45: POP
cyclope45: and thats not what pounk was set out to be
cyclope45: it was started as an anti art
cyclope45: scene in the VELVET UNDERGROUND of new york by the stoogies
cyclope45: and the ramones and the misfits
GuysSchmuys: um... some of what was punk has now become wussy pop, or rather the " artists" have changed their style
cyclope45: and in england, it was for ANARCHY
cyclope45: but now-its just trends
cyclope45: music
cyclope45: not a statement


click here to see this picture

GuysSchmuys: some of it, that's what i stay away from
cyclope45: thus-punk is dead
cyclope45: its just now-musik. in other words. POP
GuysSchmuys: no, it was always a trend
cyclope45: nope.
cyclope45: it was a statement
GuysSchmuys: very few people can ever understand it
GuysSchmuys: it was a trendy statement
cyclope45: no.
GuysSchmuys: it was the thing to do, like disco
GuysSchmuys: yes
cyclope45: your thinking clothing style


click here to see this picture

cyclope45: that wasnt punk
cyclope45: it wasnt FASHION
cyclope45: the ramones looked nothing like the sex pistols
GuysSchmuys: i'm also thinking artistically
GuysSchmuys: groups that formed because they wanted their punkness to be known
cyclope45: the stoogies were nothing like musically the mistfits
cyclope45: its was all different
cyclope45: zand morphed.
cyclope45: stop arguing, punk is dead,
GuysSchmuys: whatever, it's not
cyclope45: how so?
GuysSchmuys: punk is an attitude as well as a statement, and just because people think punk is a style and make that style more mainstream doesn't mean it's dead
GuysSchmuys: there are still punk musicians out there that aren't all about that
cyclope45: no-their rock musicians
cyclope45: yclope45: punk was attitude
cyclope45: all inall-it was rock music
GuysSchmuys: and it still is
GuysSchmuys: no, that was part of expressing it
cyclope45: woman! punk is dead-its as dead as grunge. punk musicains sound nothing like the good ole punk odf the 70's and 80's
cyclope45: are you telling me that Blink 182, Green Day and MXPX is not pop?
GuysSchmuys: hey hey, thee pirates do. just because they're not mainstream doesn't mean they aren't out there
cyclope45: y far, it is-punk has always been no sellout
GuysSchmuys: what the hell? of course they are dammit!!!
cyclope45: cannot be played on mainstream radio
GuysSchmuys: they are total sellouts
cyclope45: now, its always played on it
cyclope45: thus is not punk
cyclope45: all the under ground punk is not called punk
cyclope45: its called "
postpunk"
GuysSchmuys: no, it isn't, but they are not who i'm referring to when i'm talking about people and groups that are punk
GuysSchmuys: it doesn't fricken matter what it's called!!!!
cyclope45: hehe-have you seen SLC punk?
GuysSchmuys: no
cyclope45: they make fun of the people dressed as punks
GuysSchmuys: BlasterMaster0 (10:51 PM):i dont like the word anymore, and there are soo many differant varients and as far as i'm concerned none of it really matters. so i just tell people that i forgot what punk is
cyclope45: saying, thatthey are not "punk"
cyclope45: rather posers
GuysSchmuys: so? and a lot are
GuysSchmuys: i know punk people that dress like preps
GuysSchmuys: and i know preps that dress like "punks"
cyclope45: punk is dead.
GuysSchmuys: shut the hell up
GuysSchmuys: you are so closed minded
GuysSchmuys: that's why punk is dead to you
cyclope45: no-im realistic


No, that's not what I said, but we can argue over what i said and what I didn't say for hours. No one can prove that's a direct quote from me. Anyway, the GUI is too overwhelmingly colorful I think. Tell me though, what made you switch from PC to MAC? PC's a more customizable and have more options, when MAC's run on a selfinstalled OS with little customizability. Sure you can Open Firmware, but that's the only thing I've seen in a MAC that allows you to "tweak" things. Can you point anything else out that's built into the computer that's tweakably entertaining?
whee!


I took a day off from everything today.
...
I feel somewhat better.

Heh. If i didnt know any better - you could say i was having a mid-life crisis... but what life? and better yet, how could i be in the middle of it? HAaa hAAA hAaaH....

.... oi.

{ if you didnt notice, i posted " zee smilie man " for heather }

March 19, 2001

la la la la la

and a prospective room mate..

I do not know how to make zee smilie man.
I got a new job, I got a new job

{insert dancing heather}
la la la la la. .

I am so happy. . .
no, you said "it looked good for a while then I realized its still a Mac and you still can't do anything on it"

to which I say fuck you, Jesse

otherwise i agree the gui is quite different, which is a good thing.
and those who have used it for some time say that it feels very natural and unencombering after a while of using it, and you get to feel a lot more comfortable and efficient using it.

its all good though, you are right in that Slackware kicks ass. the new linux kernel is awesome.
I never said OS X was bad, I just said that the glamour and snazzy effects of the GUI got old after about 4 minutes. It has a terminal, which is an amazing thing for a Mac. A breakthrough from their point and click OS to a more interactive setup. Though, an upgrade doesn't make up for decades of garbage/user-friendly Operating Systems. Slackware 7.1 is the shit. Ok, so anything with a Fractal Generator is awesome. Does OS X come with a Fractal Generator? Solitare would be a big jump from Puzzle. Just remember, colors aren't everyhting to an OS (which OS X as a gross of).
. . . merely because it was repeated three times.

this messege is being edited.....

March 18, 2001

Jimmy, where the hell is that email you promised? Just as I figured, I have become so fat that even jimmy no longer can stand to speak to me... I see how it is, perhapse i shall through myself into the pit of doom, or just joint the patition to make fat joe dolls...
Heather, you are o'so right, everyone who has eyes must see how dead sexy your legs are... (note sarcasm)
.....no comment.


And now for something completely different....

Apple is releasing Mac OS X next Saturday. Those of us who deal with Macs are happy. This is really gonna change the way a lot of things with computers are done. Jesse may not think so, but fuck him (fuck you Jesse, X rules). Now that Zach is prevented from viewing this..... Anyway it’s linux for the Mac (nothing new) but it runs Mac OS programs as well. It even has "Classic Mac OS" on it, so if the X interface is more than you can handle, just start up the old one. (it’s actually running the latest, OS 9.1, but it seems classic compared to the new one) But the big thing is that it runs linux/UNIX programs as well. In addition to that, it’s programs run on any of the linux/UNIX clones out there for pc (i.e. Red Hat linux) What this means for the community of people out there using linux (this is where Jesse comes in) is that there is going to be a lot of people making a lot of software for linux, which, thankfully, is bad for Microsuck. Since they refuse to give up DOS and go to unix platform, they can be left in the dust.

Also good for me-starting next year (2002 already?) the iMac will have an LCD flatscreen display. That will cut the weight from it’s current figure, around 35 lbs, to most likely less than 10. Thank whatever higher power there may or may not be (always the agnostic) for that. Those freaking iMac get really heavy after a while. And the district has a few kicking around (I think around 2000 by this point, not entirely sure)

So the CRT (video tube) is on its way out.

Well not much more to say tonight, off to explore www.penny-arcade.com and consumptionjunction.com.....
Yes. When you all look at the 1st picture ful size, be sure to pay special attention to my lags. Yes, I know, I have sexy leags. They are my only good feature. My legs are so hot that they make me want to dirty things to me [cue 'I Touch Myself']. Oh, yeah. Any of you like Betty Page? I have Betty Page legs, and, let's face it, you really can't do much better than that. I am soooooooo incredibly sexy, how could anyone not want me? Especially since I won't do anything yo can't tell your wife. Hehe heheh ehehehe. . .so that's that. . .please note sarcasm.
thanks james, you sound like my doctor. You really know how to be kind dont you twiggy, at least i know i can break you.
isnt the picture themselves, its the dimensions i've had them put on for the board, so that they dont go and mess the board up. if you want to see full sized versions ( which i suggest because the dead thing is oh-so-neat to look at ) click on the pictures and the full sized thing will pop up for you, in another window.

hee hee hee!
jesus heather, you really need a better scanner, I know im fat, but christ, not that fat. Your pictures are distorted, what kinda scanner are you useing? Better question, what kinda scanner is James using?
lalalalalaaaa strangers still have yet to identify themselves...
look into zee dead stuff

WHarrgh!

another picture because heather looks OH-SO-MUCH-MORE prettier than 1) jesse's girlfriend, 2) the other girl in the picture 3) anyone else! HAH!

wheee!
Not really a Bradburian conspiracy, more like a conspiracy involving Bradbury.

Mr. Morgan:
{short answer}
No

{long answer}
There is no chance that I can give you the override code, because there no longer is an override. The "teacher" auth went away in November, and now there aren’t any overrides given out. The only overrides that may or may not exist-I’m not entirely sure-would belong to network administrators (which I am not) and/or higher-ups, such as the superintendent (which I also am not), Therefore if I were to get one of these codes (unlikely) and give it to you (not going to happen), I would get fired and you would get expelled. They track who does what, and when. And once they found out it was you, they wouldn’t have to think hard to figure out I was the one who gave it to you.

Well....that is all.

You all just wasted all that time to read this useless post. Don’t you feel like horse’s asses right now?

March 17, 2001

You guys with your porn wars, thats not porn thats smut, you want porn give me your email addy and ill show you porn
Bradbury is there any chance you could get me the override code for the bess program whatchamacallit
who are all these new people?
Im so confused. I dont like new people. Identify yourselves.
hmmm... a Bradburian Conspiracy i see.....
Hmm..... haven’t posted in a while. Didn’t miss much.

At Evergreen Elementary there were Seafair Pirates yesterday. Quite the bunch. First clue was the Jolly Roger flying on the flagpole outside. Made me think twice about entering the building, what with the "scull and crossbones" flapping in the wind. Get inside and people are dressed funny. Then I spot the pirates themselves. Anyway that was not what I expected. Nice guys.

Bleck there is really nothing happening, or at least nothing I can talk about. There is plenty going on that I can’t talk about on here, however. Matter of fact I really couldn’t talk about it in person, but anyway this stuff going on (actually more than one thing, but again ...) and that’s why I haven’t been posting....

Well now I’m off to find some breakfast.

March 16, 2001

I am a postin'. but not for long, as I must go continue packing. Hmmm. . .I watch Maple all day today. It sucked. I'm too damn old for children.
at james' insistance(naked?)..i am posting more.
lalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalala
lalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalala lalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalala
lalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalallalalalalalalalalalalala
lalalalalalalallalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalala

you should all be ashamed of yourselves......cause noone but jeff and james and i posted today
and that is sad. sadness............
i tried to go find the bathroom and like i got lost.it was funny. yeah..i could do college life.......i want to find some chicks.
chicks are coooooooooooool.
gotta love girls..(naked?)
james i fucking hate you.
ok. i guess this is the post to inform my parents / brother / family / heather that i am safe and sound in Jeff's apartment / abode ... FUCK !!! what is the word for that? uhmm.... this is... a... ... errr.... a ... what... it's on the 8th floor... its what college students go to.. ..................................................... dorm.... orgazmo is playing to my right and jimmoi and zach are thinking about going to find some women.... we can hear ( or could hear ) them giggling across the hallways. I think someone ordered pizza. i am hungry. someone just got their knees busted in with a baseball bat.. i found that funny... matt stone just got paid. i didnt catch how much.

in any event... ok.... NOW they are ordering.... i think we'll be going to look at the computer lab later on tonight... wow... pizza delievery really doesnt cost all that much... im sorry if my posts dont look good... i dont have time to think about formatting the manner in which it is laid out for you at the moment, considering this is not my computer and i feel all funky on this computer.

ok... this post has gone and been horribly mutilated.... im just going to go now...
thats it... oh... because i want to take up more time just to piss off zach and make him wait some more... i am going to post...



NOW THAT IS A STUDLY HUNK OF MEAT. DONT YOU WANT HIM?!?!?!

yes, i know you do.
PLUTO.
im at jeffs place :) he was bitching about how noone has posted..so i am obliging him! fuck transit. and fuck "opticon". they stole a dollar from jimmoi. he was massively pissed, and so yeah..for a few minutes james, me and jimmoi were fighting. yes. the jackpot we went to smelled like garbage. jimmoi says he"fucking hates opticon!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" so yeah.

perhaps more later.


Power Wapler to the Rescue!




Often times i have used this forum to vent my anger at the Metro system, for i have a deep-seeded dislike for the buses. Why? Well, there are several reasons, of which i am sure Zach is fully aware of. One time, i was just getting off of a Ferry, and i had a minute to run all the way to the bus stop. No problem, i thought to myself, and i took off running for that stop. Well, i was within 10 feet of the stop, fully visible to the bus stop, when the bus comes a'drivin' by. YES!, i thought to myself as i started waving my arms to get his attention. Did i? Why yes i did, for the bus driver turned his head and looked right at me...and then he kept on driving by!

Yes indeed i have a great disrespect for certain bus drivers, and i generally don't like the buses all that much. It isn't because i don't know how they work, because i have become fully acquianted with the ways of the metro system.

Indeed, after my past three months of getting to know the metro system, i was fully ready to proclain the metro system as the most vile evil system ever put into place...and then this Thursday i was once again proven that just when you think something is horribly wrong in the world, there always comes along something even more vile and disgusting in the world... That even more vile and disgusting thing is the Passenger system of the Washington State Ferry service.

For those of you who don't know, or simply don't care, i should give some quick background information. The Washington State Ferry system is a fleet of ferries that transport people across the Puget Sound. Mr. Miller will remember our brief, almost-encounter, with the ferry system when we had a choice of driving from Poulsbo to Seattle or taking the ferry. If it had been my car, we probably would have taken the ferry since it would have been cheaper. Instead, we drove. (It was joe ellefson's car. Sorry joe, if you ever by some drunken chance stumble upon this post.)

Now there are two types of ferries, the automobile ferry, and the passenger ferry. I have always used the automobile ferry in the past because it was just more convenient and far more cheaper. However, on Thursday, i thought to myself, Hey, why not try the passenger ferry, it is closer to downtown Seattle. So that is what i did.

The passenger ferries take forever, and they are crowded beyond belief. It was like standing in a concentration camp waiting to be executed by gas. No, wait, i know exactly what it was like. Have you ever seen those old movies about immigration? That's exactly how i felt as i watched the Seattle coastline get smaller and smaller. I felt like someone was shipping me off to Boswania. However, that is not my biggest grievance with the passenger ferry. Because the internal cabin was extremely crowded, i decided to sit outside, with half a dozen other people, most of which decided to smoke. Well, just when i was about ten minutes away from my destination, i get a whiff of the most horrid stench imaginable. I turned around, and there standing with his back toward me was a fat smelly bastard.

It was like he had eaten been burritos, the remains of the great Pharoahs of egypt, and whatever lies on the floor of jOe's house. It was not the most enjoyable smell. And then, when the trip was almost over, i went inside. Only the stench followed me in there too!

My good friend Mr. Wapler understood my situation. He helped me put together this diagram:


Smelly bastard diagram


Now, i know this is just a small inconvenience and i should stop my petty bitching about stupid stuff and get on with my life, but you all know me and that really isn't an option. Instead, i'd rather rant and rave, and blow things out of proportion until someone gets fed up enough to phone in the psych ward. (Incidentally, there is a locked-ward in UW. Coincidence? hmmm...)

Now just imagation my plight if while i was on the ferry, T-Rex suddenly came up out of the water:

Oh no, run for your lives!

Ah, but all you out there are saying, "Silly man, if T-Rex attacks a ferry, you'd be in danger even if there wasn't a smelly bastard standing nearby." Ah, but that's where you are wrong my friends...

What if T-Rex started breathing fire:

Portable marshmellow roaster, built right-in!

Ahh, does it make more sense now? You see, if T-Rex started breathing fire, then i'd be in a world of hurt. Since good ol' smelly-bastard would be letting his methane permeate the air around me, i will, in essence, find myself in a powerkeg-type setting. One little flame would ignite all that foul smelling methane and KaBOOM!, there i would go.

Yes, i am fully aware that there is no scientific proof that T-Rex was able to shot fire from his mouth. But then again, there is no proof against it.

So now you see my predicament, and why i will not ride the passenger ferry anymore. There is just too much danger. And if you all don't believe me, then i bet you'd be surprised to find out that Harry Wapler had to go through a similar ordeal. That was part of the reason why he helped me make that lovely diagram above. Thankfully for Mr. Wapler, he was able to fight off the beastial T-Rex before being consumed at sea:

Go PowerWapler!


What a brave, courageous newscaster, unlike that Tom Brokaw.
Nice.

March 15, 2001



Happy Valentine's Day, Mr. Rogers...




Being in college provides one with many excellent opportunities for various programs. While, i have not yet participated in many of these programs, i hear they are really quite excellent. Take for example this program that was put together for Valentine's Day, to explain and exemplify the dangers of unprotected sex:

During the week before Valentine's day, leading up to Valentine's day, my dorm building, and the dorm building connected to mine, put together this little psuedo-experiment that they dubbed "Sex in an Envelope". While it sounded quite an interesting little idea...i decided not to go along with it. It was quite a smart move, as i would later find out.

Basically, the way it worked was you put your name on a mailing list. Anybody on this list would be the participants. Each day the building would mail you another piece to your specific scenerio. Some people got good ones, but the majority got bad ones. For example, as the days progressed, my roommate found out that he was raped by the popular girl on campus and that he obtained chlamydia...all because he got drunk at a party and someone gave him the date rape drug. That was funny. But not everyone had a funny outcome.

They guy across the hall from me had an interesting little scenerio given to him. Apparently he was a guy whose girl just dumped him. As a result, he turned to the internet to seek comfort, and he found it, in a girl. As the days went on, they decided to meet at an internet cafe. Finally, the big day comes. Oh la la... So he goes to the internet cafe. But there is no girl. Well, not quite. There was an old lady, and off to the side a guy named Aaron. So this guy decides that she is a no-show. However, just as he is walking out, he hears the guy call to him, "Hey, it's me!" Now, when the person next door (his name is Matt, just in case all you out there were curious) read this, he laughed, and decided to see where this played out. At first it was funny. However, on the last day of the program, Valentine's Day, he was in for a little surprise, for as the days kept passing, his fate kept getting worse. Here is the final piece of the scenerio, received on Valentine's Day:



On Valentine's Day, Aaron lets you in on a little secret of his own. He is HIV positive, and wants you to know before it becomes too big of a problem. The two of you decide on sexual boundaries, and continue to have a great relationship centered sexually around protective oral sex. You join GBLTC, an on-campus support group for gay youth, and this makes it easier to come out to others. You and Aaron decide to get married in Vermont.



Damn, that is kinda sad isn't it. Do you see know why exactly i am glad i didn't participate?
Nice.
no posts today. LALALAALALALALAALALA except for james.....anyways.....im hungry. i am going to a play tonight. yay. not much else to say. FUCK PIERCE TRANSIT!!!!!!!!!!!!
OH MY JEBUS F. CHRUST!


i do so command every single soul to go out and download Djarum by Autechre ........... Yuuuuummmmmmm..

March 14, 2001

James- i know the internet is everywhere. jimmoi was just thinking that as of for now i wont be able to post very ofetn because of my crhistian server cause ill be done with school. but today i found out that i wasnt gonna finish my study skill class on time, so i asked the instructor guy, and be extended me over into next quarter..for freeeeeeee..so i will be able to use the lab pcs indefinitely. i dont wantt to go on that stupid trip. its gay. oh well. at least in texas i will be able to get laid multiples of times.......
yeah..gotta love texas
the following messege will be encrypted with PGP.. which stands for Pretty Good Privacy. if you wish to view the messege : go to a search engine and type in : PGP DOWNLOAD : then find a download site : then decrypt and read the messege! FUN HAPPY TIME!!!!!!!


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jeff......i have been hearing about this"mega post" forever.im beginning to become disillusioned as to the likelyhood of it actually happening. anyways......having to live with the fact that i am moving soon, sucks. im at pierce college right now, hehe theres boobs here. way to go jimmoi! james you have to go on friday! im hella bored. thats all for now.
... well - i just confronted my parents and it looks like it 'went well' -- i used the 'HAH HAH HAH, so the guys said " JAMES ASK YOUR PARENTS " and i said " ah nah, i dont really feel like asking them " and they kept pestering me saying we'll take the bus and we'll see shakespear and i was like "nah guys, it's ok - i wont go - i dont got the money" ... and they gave me the 'awww look at james, he is asking us for money unwillingly' ... yeah... who's the mastermind at reverse psychology? thats what i thought. downside : however i did just go through and take out the trash. ... hmm.

in any event.. let us deal with people one by one.

Rachelle

i am sorry to say that any store-bought computer, be it gateway or compaq, is crap. crap crap crap. heather has a compaq and i tried to 'twink around with it' ... i cant do shit - merely because half of the things running "quietly" i dont know what the hell they do. bottom line : ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwww

Zach

Oi! leaving so soon, and we've only known eachother for such little time? why is it that you wont be able to post with us online still? have you yet forgotten that the internet is everywhere* and that you can still post with us?? all these questions i will ask you when i come along on friday! wa haha. it sucks, but hey - it's been great, eh? eh? We'll be sure to make this upcoming jimmi-day a day that nobody will forget. not even if you get into a car accident, severly damage your spinal cord, have you conciousness come and go, and have problems with holding in poopies .... YOU'LL STILL REMEMBER US. and i'll remeber you because you're the reason i went to my FIRST concert type dilly. you ever been to a play before?

Jeff

ok... im just curious : i got this strange feeling you were trying to tell me something in your last post... i cant... quite... put my finger on what it was ... but whatever it was - i do know one thing!! IT WASNT THE MEGA POST!!!! ( da da daaaaaaaaaaaaaaa )

and we might have to do a movie - just so we can immortalize zach into something. we could do a really crappy slasher flick and call it "ZACH" and he'll be the killer and we could get hot college chicks to act like they're dead and nude and... oh, did i say nude? err.... i mean.. dead... yeah... dead..... anywho.. yeah.

oh - finally : see if you can set up some manner in which we will definately eat.... since it'll be after school i will more-than-likely be hungry - and if you can : you know ... like set up some sort of pizza delivery or whatnot. college = pizza. and we'll definately have to hang out at a coffee-shop late, late at night. anywho. that's just a concern of mine. i'll be sure to bring some sort of 'extra-lunch' too : just in case.

Jimmoi

we still taking the bus? egg-salad. however that'll leave me with only $5 left for 'spendn money' ... hmmmmm. will still do... i dont even know if i want to go see the play - because 1) i dont like that play 2) it costs me money. hah... but we'll probably end up doing that anyway. you should try to con jeff into telling a lot of college girls that a rich, oriental, single guy is coming up to visit him and that he has two body guards that follow him around everywhere. heh ... that'd be cool.

and since you've taken it upon yourself to post pornography... i myself shall do the same... welcome to....

PORN WARZ

yuuuuuuuurm
heeeeeeeee.




ok. that's all. - by the way, click on them and you'll get a BIGGER VERSION of the smaller picture. heh. yeah, you know you want it.
and the cat is there so heather can go "oh she's cute" ... heh. heheh.

:)

PLUTO.


Purposeful delays…




*Disclaimer: This is not the MegaPost. Plans for that have changed and will be described below.

First, I’d like to make a statement or two real quick about that little MegaPost that I have been continuously references for the past few days, and which has yet to materialize. I know I have critics out there, such as Mr. Miller and Mr. Collins, who do not even think I can pull it off. Well, fear not, for it will come…however, it will not come today as planned.

After carefully considering it, I have decided to continue working on it, but to postpone posting it until AFTER both Mr. Collins and Mr. Miller come up to visit me this Friday. This way I can collaborate with them on my plans for the MegaPost, and if they wish, they can contribute to it as well. Plus james knows a great deal of web-tricks that I might want to employ. For that reason, I am NOT going to post it until after they come. Hint, hint: Come on Friday james!

Now then, as for something else. jimmy has proposed that for “jimmy-day” (which will be the first time I get to participate in such an event, Hint, hint: Come on Friday james!) we go to a theatre in downtown seattle and check out “A Midsummer Night’s Dream” by Shakespeare. I am perfectly fine with that idea. However, as a result of some people’s loss of urge to go, I have decided that I will NOT get reservations because I don’t want to be stuck paying $40 dollars for a show that we are not going to end up going to.

Here is another idea in case the first one for “jimmy-day” doesn’t pan out. We could always try making a quick movie. Or for that matter we can see if we can go to the Harvard Exit Theatre. Jimmy, you should know what I am talking about. And I have nightvision…oh la la.

Oh, and another thing. About that question I posed last Wednesday (the one about Heinz and his wife with cancer), I will post the results on Thursday or Friday. This is mostly because I’ve only had like one response, and that was from Mr. Bradbury. If you want to know what I am talking about, and want to read the moral dilemma, then just check out last Wednesday’s post by me. If someone wants me to re-write the dilemma, just ask.

Well, that’s all I feel like writing write now.

Oh wait, there was one more thing.

jAMES COME ON FRiDAY!!!
March 12th's Fox Trot - well, Bill Amend knows, It's said to have been on the news in some places also.
WOO! Happy Pi Day! WOO! Too bad I'm sick.
well-ive been mute for awhile-fucking INVENTORY PREP and shit...god i hate target and its ANDROIDIAN inventory CYBORGS! and i dont care what james says, hes a commin to jimmy day to jeff's seattle. its going to be fun and hes gonna enjoy it. especially since its going to be e premature farewell party to zach.

thats right, zach is leaving us...hes moving back to TEXAS. i am sad. i will cry now.

and i lighter note: i got my IQ scores back, and never read any post earlier. i got a 177. i did one page. because i lost my connection. oh well.

last jimmy day was accoring to zach, the best jimmy day in exsistence. we hung out at the mall, picked up james gamer counterpart, charlie. the army guy that looks like hes 17 but hes actually 23. neet guy. we went tot he arcade, where my thighs got sore. their, in the mall-was the ultamate arcade game. by playing with it-you'll also exercise too. get a work out. its kindda hard to explain. so i wont. we also went into Kmart and play noise tag or somthing woith toy guns. that was fun.we also wento VAULE VILLAGE. that place roolz. it does. james got this book about...hhehe, uhm, yea.

zach is leaving us...i am sadden. he's leaving next week to kansas to look for houses and in two months...he'll be gone forever. there goes PORNOSTARZ WITH DOWNSYNDROME II...

jeff-on fridya, james is COMmING and so is ZACH-and i wont be able to sleep over due to work and fucking INVENTORY!!!

I had some RAD things to post about...but forgot, so i'll be telling you about the stupidess thing i ever saw.

TOP FOODS: in top foods, getting our jones soda, zach and i saw three RAVERS/PREPPIES?TEENYBOPPERS godknows what, riding these...skate shoes. they were sneakers...with a wheel in the back. WTF?! it was stoopid...i never heard or seen thewm before, but apperently their a hot item, cus now everywhere i look some buttfucking raver, or panzy ass preppy, or annoying little teenybopper is wearing them. i hate fucking ravers. zach is calling them dipshit shoes. yay.

james, can you ask your parents for 10 bucks for the play, at least? tell them it is for SHAKESPEAR! they cant say no to SHAKESPEAR! its A MIDSUMMER NIGHTS DREAM! farries damn you! FARRIES!!!

now i can understand what james is going through-but please, do not let it interfear with JIMMY DAY or SHAKESPEAR!!! hehe, i can read james' head right now...hehe. fuck off jimmoi. i hate you.

i am sadden still. xach is leaving us.

well-im finish posting. zach and i will be at the school at TWO O'CLOCK. so, napsterif you'll like to bid farwell to a fellow blogginoid/slugman you can. anyone else can meet him and bid farewell-since the chances of him posting after friday are slim, since hes out of school thursday.

well-now, its your moment of zen.

i first saw this at zachs house. now you should all be shocked because in zachs house, they have a CHRISTIAN SERVER thus,

he shouldnt get this picture, theoretically speaking. i should like to see if he can...i hope he does, cus then he can POST! about something other than dead chris farley...i think zach wants to have narco-sumthing or anoither sex with Dead Chris Farley...may he Rest In Peace. buttsex?

March 13, 2001

Im so confused right now. We just got our new computer. Its a gateway, and alot better than our old compaq-piece of crap. Although it frightens me with the abilities that I am able to do with this thing. The only thing I dont like is that it has AOHell and its screen is eerily large...
Any who.... I havent been to my online class in about 2 weeks so I guess I should go see whats going on there before my giant screen sucks me into the deep void of cyber-space.
jeff - i might not come up this weekend. i dont know. things are going fucked up in my head. i have to think. and money is scarce. i hope to - but it's no guarentee.

bradbury - use a tripod account and upload all the files you want to the main directory ( ie: not in a folder ) and then img src to them on this -- it works... hell, to save you the trouble of getting a tripod account yourself : goto ftp.tripod.com / user name zakpow / password 2410. there is a lot of crap on the place - but i don't mind a few extra tidbits of crap.. Mind you - if i find anything uploaded by that mongrel of a non-boobie-posting boy Jeff i will imediately remove it. he has his UNIVERSITY space. - grumbles -

in any event, im at heather's again. hoo - rah.
i get to sleep on the couch. watch out buddy, not sleeping with me isn't a punishment after i've been conditioned to do it anyway.

... and the ending catch-phrase :

PLUTO.
Yes yes yes very good. You could post that picture any time, jEFF.

Well the truck's engine didn't cook itself. Nor did it overheat on the trip home. But this is very easily explained, maybe I’ll use pictures to demonstrate. Yes, I think I will.....


Ok this picture is from when I had it apart before, with the leaking and such when I first got it.



A little theory of operation first:
As the picture illustrates (looking at the pump from the engine side), the shaft and the impeller come through, driven by the fan belt, and spin. Water comes in from the bottom of the radiator, after being cooled, around the shaft, gets pumped out through those channels and back in to the engine to get heated. All this happens AFTER the water in the engine reaches a certain temperature, and the thermostat opens to allow water in to the radiator to be heated. Before that, the pump merely circulates the water through the engine and cabin heater. Prior to full-temp, water enters the pump through the bypass (top of picture) which draws heated water from behind the thermostat, as well as from the heater return hose, and pushes it back in, to keep water moving across the metal and evenly reach operating temperature. The feed for the cabin heater comes directly from the engine, and is not visible here.

What most likely happened (haven’t opened it yet, but I can make a very well educated guess) is the shaft and the impeller, being connected not with a welded joint, but are only press-fitted together. Well it is not unknown for them to become no longer connected once they reach high speed and temp, so this is what most likely happened, during my trip down the mountain highway. So by the time I hit 224th, it was not drawing any water from the radiator, causing it to overheat. But the slow, easy trip home, down 224th, 46th and other such back roads, was not stressful enough to cause the impeller to stop...?impelling?-if that’s the word.

But I didn’t pull it apart tonight (slightly warm after the drive). The plan for the trip home was, drive it until it gets warm enough to worry me, pull over and tow it the rest of the trip with the red & white Ford (the old one I used to drive) but it never got above normal temp.


Anyway-

We got a KVM switch today (Keyboard Video Mouse)

It allows you to connect up to 32 computers to 4 workstations-each of the workstations being a monitor, keyboard and mouse.. Quite the thing, it has a bunch of video and mouse inputs, and comes with a variety of really long (up to 35 feet) video, mouse and keyboard cables. You just pick which computer you want to work on, and BOOM you have it’s display. And it only cost ${censored}.

I’ll take some pictures to illustrate.


(by the way-geocities sucks big fat hairy scrotum. The file "pumpgraphic.jpg" was not accessable, was not being shared out by their server, so I spent quite some time tryimg in vain to get it to work.)


All Good Things...




*Disclaimer: Apparently Mr. Collins didn't read one of my earlier posts about the MegaPost and its current status. For a quick recap, expect the MegaPost on Wednesday, after my test and everything. That will be the first day in a long long while that i will actually have the time resources available to create the last parts needed for the MegaPost. However, i will work on part of it today, now that i have some more free time. Although i am considering saving it for the weekend, when my good friends Mr. Collins and Mr. Miller will be coming up here...exhilariting hilarity will ensue.

Ahhh...you know how sometimes when you finally do something, and you do something right, you feel completely exhilarated, and at the same time completely relaxed. I'm sure Mr. Bradbury understands that feeling...he probably got it the same time that he finished his truck and was able to drive it for the first time. Well, i had that type of feeling today, after i finished my Psych 306 exam final, after doing a massive study job for the past couple of days. It wasn't that i didn't know the material mind you, but the tests she gives would make even Ghandi want to employ some harsh "negotiation" upon her.

For example, she enjoys giving these "fill-in-the-blank" questions, and supplying an inordinate amount of answers that all don't fit, but could reasonably fit if one didn't read word for word, line by line, letter by letter, the exact definition of that word. At this point i am sure Mr. Collins is groaning right now, as he and i see eye to eye on the issue of fill-in-the-blank and multiple choice questions. They are nothing more than "Hey, how much information can i regurgitate unwittingly by being given a serious of choices?" or "How good am i at guessing what an answer is by whittling down the obviously incorrect ones?". And yet George Bush wants to increase these type of standardized testing...ahhh, but that's an issue i don't want to deal with right now...and i do not know the full facts behind his education agenda, so i won't go into a huge argument against it just yet, for it might just end up as a debacle on my part.

Anyway though, i took this test, fully wary of what it might contain, and i aced that bastard. Especially the essay section, hell yeah. No! i am not having an episode about how well i did, but i should...because i did damn well! I needed to ace it too, because i really screwed up her last prefabricated pieces of dog feces (feces in exchange for a better word so that zach can indeed read my post if he so wishes) of exams. Not that i am bitter...oh no, not me, not at all.

But enough about that test. I am also quite enthusiatic for other reasons as well. For one, that class is now officially over. No longer do i have to wake up at the awful, mind-numbing, hour of 6 - 7 in the morning. I can actually sleep in, or wake up at that time and just laze about for a bit...at least until i get another job, which i am planning on doing. Oh well, i can dream can't i?

Also, i am going to start working on both that re-release of "The Bethel Slayer", that i had to put on the back-burner, as well as my MegaPost that i have been promising. (Hey, hyping something up worked well for Lucas didn't it? Oh wait, maybe it didn't, cause that movie was rather dissapointing in some aspects.) Also, i get to hang out with jimmy and james on friday, and probably go see a Midsummer Night's Dream at a theatre in downtown seattle. That should be cool. I just have to make calls i suppose, but that shouldn't be too difficult.
Ahem, well that all said, i am just about done. I'd like to quickly apologize to Zach for not having the picture of the girl flashing the camera just yet. I would have had it sooner, but someone was using the only computer-movie workstation in the only computer lab i know of to have a computer-movie workstation. As a result, i could not get that picture just yet. I will try to have it up by the end of the week.

As for paintball, which i am looking forward to, i will most likely not be able to do it during spring break, purely for the reason that my spring break does NOT coincide with Bethel's Spring break. Damn you Bethel, damn you. If it is on a weekend however, then i might be able to do something with that. It depends.

And now i leave you all with an image taken from my good friend Harry Wapler's underground newsreport. Here he is demonstrating the power of the Thought To Text (T3) Translator (the name is a work in progress):


The T3 Translator in action!
Here you can clearly see the T3 Translator in action. It takes thoughts from both animals and humans, and humans with the IQ of small animals, and displays them in "thought-bubbles". The rammifications of such an invention are quite astounding. Mr. Wapler also drew several highly creative and time consuming red lines to show the unidentified man's main focus. Quite an interesting newscast, wouldn't you say?


I can see that having Mr. Wapler as an associate will prove highly valuable in the coming times. We worked hard to create the T3 Translator, so i hope you all enjoy.
Nice.

March 12, 2001



heh heh heh. . .someone please fix this picture if I did it wrong. . .it is not ham this time.
heh cool.
Hahahaha....

oh, er, wait.


shit.
Apparently I am also a man because I prefer white to blue, because I would rather be lonely then bleed to death, and because I said the test was retarded. How about that one?
hahahahaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa! I am 86% likely to kiss heather while drunk at a party. Beautiful. Scary part is, Im 88% likely to kiss bradbury...what was your number again?
.... you see - life is predictable, and stupid.
that IQ test... as i figured - was a 'ha ha funny look at the dumbshit who kept answering questions' quiz. for those of you who haven't taken it yet - i've just ruined it for you. in any event, i figured as much - and i am, officially stupid.
scores :

My IQ : 88
Partially retarded.
Worldwide Average: 102

You answered a total of 66 pages.
The average number is 31 pages!
2069633 people have taken TheSpark's IQ test.
The stupidest person so far answered 1220279 pages of questions.
His e-mail address is: curtisj1@mac.com.


thespark.com then suggests to me that i : The best thing you can do at this point is make your friends feel incredibly stupid. Forward the test. You'll find that your friends who think they're smartest ACTUALLY GET THE LOWEST SCORES. Just don't tell them how the test works. ... lucky for all of you - i dont care for this moronic matter in which to disprove intelligence. i found the test itself to be stupid --- WITH EXCEPTION to some questions... which are as follows :

Which of the following does not belong?
a) Girlfriend b) Wife c) Babysitter d) Mistress


what's your answer? my answer was none of them!
hah! get it! someone out there is fucking the babysitter! HAHAHA.

ahhh... yeah, that one was good... and the second one :

Which of the following does not belong?
a) Lights b) Camera c) Friction d) Action


you may have said friction ( just like michael did ) but you may notice that you are INCORRECT ... as in the process of making a porno video there are always the following things involved : lights, cameras, action, and friction. HAH HAH HAH. funny stuff..

the last one wasn't a 'which doesnt belong' but rather a joke in itself :

The Matrix: The more you see it, the more it ROCKS!
True False


man. that gave me a good laugh... wheee...

that is all.