May 13, 2006

You Never Truly Escape


Seeking nostalgia, partly because I saw an old friend (from the 5th-6th grade era) today, I decided to go looking through my vast collection of pictures. As I was doing so, I ran across a picture that brought me back to my days of working at Target.

Ah, yes, for those young'uns that don't realize it (and you all really need to start respecting your elders - Michael, DT, I'm looking at you fuckers), I used to be a part of the grand Target family.

(You know, that family that you try to hide away and pretend like you aren't related to.) To be sure, I wasn't the first of us to work there. That honor is purely reserved for Jimmy. But I was one of the first in a line of many of us who would go on to work there.

Others such as:

  • Jimmy Miller

  • Michael Collins

  • Zacho

  • Steven Pearson (I think... someone verify this for me, if you're not all too busy playing WOW)

  • Joe Ellefson (someone you don't know)

  • Kyle Batie (another someone you don't know)

  • Cali Archer (see above)

Yeah... now I know some of those are names that you don't know. Ohhh, big surprise, Jeff knows people outside this group of people. Maybe if you all read the board and posted, I wouldn't need to go off and make new friends. I blame you all.

But anyway, suffice it to say, many of us have felt the taint of Target.

And specifically, the taint of this man:

OMG, It's Roger... At UW... Is nowhere safe?
"Let's hit it hot, hard, and heavy!"

Yes, good ol' Roger.

Now you might be askin': "Why Jeff, why are you talking about this man when its been years since you've had to work under his oppressive aussie thumb?" Well, because I was a fool.

A fool?

Yes, a fool. For years, I stayed up here in Seattle, around the UW, thinking that I was safely tucked away in my corner of the state. And then, much to my surprise, this man shows up... and at the one place I would have thought I was the safest: UW. Look at that picture carefully... notice that he's not inside a Target... or a SuperTarget... or some sort of UltraMegaTarget? That's because he's hanging out in Mary Gates Hall... trying to recruit more Targetears... the bastard.

And he recognized me. Which is the sad, scary part.

I lost where I was going with this rant. So to tie it up... you all keep in mind... those things that you fear the most... those things that you thought you could escape by running away... oh no my friends. You never escape. They always show up... whether or not you expect it.

Hmm, I wish I could say I was happy with this post, but I'm not. Not that it matters. You all won't read it. Lazy bastards.

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