Mmmmm... used paper towels. Tastey.
Welcome to :
If the machines I worked with were women-machines.

something funny I came up with while being worked to death yesterday.

1. when something is wrong, instead of the machine obstinately shutting down it would continue to produce shitty boxes - now WHY would a machine do that? You forget - IT IS A WOMAN MACHINE. It will continue to produce shitty boxes and you know - it'd probably start messing up the feeding to where my job would be more hard than it already is. WHY AGAIN? Because it would expect me to know that *SOMETHING* is wrong. And until I took the time ( which would probably be never because I'm too busy feeding the bloody machine ) to actually notice something is wrong - it will sit there and continue to fuck up. But no. When we recieve bad stock / and I start feeding it / instead of it being a little whore of a woman and not saying a damn thing - it chokes up. it's a machine. Thank God.

2. Imagine me working. I'm doing good. Then lunch break comes along. So I stop feeding the machine and leave for 20minutes. I come back - and guess what? The machine is GONE - you wanna know why? Because while I was gone it figured that I would be out feeding another machine and it went out and left me. Because I had to take a 20min break out of the 8 god-damn hours I have to work with it. There is no " me " time with a machine-woman. All time must be spent with the machine. Any time spent away from the machine means that you believe the machine is substandard or " not as good as other machines. " Guh.

3. Our machine would then be concerned with " how it looked. " ... We would have a special pressure hose connected to a barrel of spray-on lipstick/makeup. periodically, ever two hours, when the makeup is running off of the machine / someone will have to spray it all on. this will only serve one purpose - that when you touch the machine lipstick and makeup will smear onto you, creating a mess. There will be no other use for the spray-on lipstick/makeup. The only people who will actually care for the "machine looking good" would be the people who come by on tours who DO NOT FEED and DO NOT WORK at the factory. They come by / they look at things / smile a lot / and maybe when nobody is looking they pull down their pants and give the machine a good time for one night / then they're gone. ...

Fuck.

anywho - I got to listen to zach-o's band last night through the wonderous technology of mankind. It was LIVE - it sounded pretty good / so good some dumb women out there would probably fuck them for making squeeky noises. I told them to tell those women specifically that I was part of the band / so that in the event they want to fuck someone - I'm readily availiable. Of course - they'd probably take the hot ones for themselves and leave me with Becky Pierce.

*shudders*

Im on the third Dune book. I havent gotten dressed yet. The Run Lola Run DVD is broke, so I have to wait for another one to come in the mail. MD Geist sucks ass. I have no DVDs to watch. bloody hell.

ok, enough from me.