[Boob-Slappin' Excitement]

What a great day to be alive.

Pssh.

I hate my roommate. I do. I can't explain it. I have disliked my past roommates in the past, but that comes and goes. It's all a part of living with people. You get on each others nerves. You annoy each other. You date annoying girls which piss your roommates off... but in the end, you're all still friends. You learn to accept and move on... and you tolerate.

But fuck if I'm ever gonna tolerate Ari.

I can't help it. I've tried. You all know me. I try. I think i've only hated a select few people in the course of my life:

Mr. Parr
David Sanders
The Entire Cast of Q13 Fox
A guy named George
Red Honda Civic Hatchbacks (not a person, i know, but i still hate them)
Tim Iman

I think this guy might be moving up on my list.

Think of every nuance that was ever made fun of on Seinfeld, roll them up, mash them together, and bake in an oven for an hour and you have Ari.

He's a loud talker.
An in your face talker.
A smoker.
A mooch.
Wanna screenwriter.
An interrupter.
A repeater.
A name-dropper.

The list could go on... and on... and on.

I think i'm gonna need heavy medication for this one.

Oh... oh...
and he's from California. That says a lot right there... though hopefully it won't bring up that age-old fact that California sucks.

Because it does.