2002
minus
1981
equals
21

not only is one more year down the drain -
but my age changes as well.
go figure.

'ello govnah.

that had nothing to do with anything. this sickness is starting to kick in again - this " I wish I was worse off than I am now, therefore giving me some sort of direction " - and what was immediately at thought was alcoholism. I want to be an alcoholic now, but rarely can stand the taste ( or kick ) of alcohol. Then I could be a heroine addict. I've heard so many stories of people " coming off of heroine " by being locked into rooms and going through withdrawals - you can see this also featured in the film trainspotting - and hey : that movie was good. It would be great. It would give me something to fight. Oh... wow... it is crazy how one can be.

I might write a story coming up soon. It has something to do with a stray cat - but I dont exactly know what. It will be a grey cat. One once said that my poetry and essays really sucked ass - but my stories were sometimes good. I resented that. I prefer when people say my scribblings are sub-par. It makes me feel better, because wherein they dont like what I write - I take a large quantity of joy in - so they cannot share in the experience and feelings that I have - but when they go and do things like ... enjoy my scribblings - then I think they're up to something. They're out to make me think they enjoy what I write merely so they can get some sort of leverage on me.

What happened to pantera? They were awesome, and they continue to be - but what happened to them. I remember there used to be some sort of small following with them - and all of this " new metal " - being linkin park and system of a down and so-on and so-on, I just realised that pantera had been doing those things long before - and so ... where is the big pantera hype? And what happened to Lisa Simpson being the melodramatic blues-singing sax-playing semi-intelligent hipster that she used to be? ah...

Life seems to burn a hole into your pocket. Making everything you place there fall through and then land onto your foot. Somehow - someday, you end up kicking it off.

then the fun begins.

a couple of things.

1- GTA 3 is too much fun. too much fun.

2- Metal Gear Solid 2 is fun, although short - and much too many scripted sequences versus playing.

yes.
PS2.
fun.
much.

oh yes.... so does the other neet chicabee on this now vegitative board....

you know what James/other nutty perverts.... I now have a picture of two hot blonde Swedish lesbians making out... HAHAHAAAAAAAAAA :p

Hmmm. I want to talk about sheep. I love sheep, but in a strictly platonic manner. Yes. That's it. I wish I was Little Bo Peep, but only after she found them there sheep. I'd be a forlorn cattle while my sheep were gone. I'd cry. a lot.

You know what the best thing about sheep is? The way they baa all the time. It's so cute. It makes me want to take them all home with me to be my special pets and also friends. Sheep rule.

On a not-sheep-related note, I found out that MerryBoat's gpa and SATs were lower than mine. I hope this means I can get into UW relatively easily. Yeah, buddy.

I wish sheep came in as many colors as sweaters do.

hello again.... there is something to be said considering all that has happened, but then I think, why should I share that? It doesn't matter to anyone else but me and a few other indviduals here over seas, so forget that. To long of a tale anyway.... LOL. So are all the BHS people enjoying their break? I know I have enjoyed mine. I don't have to got back to school till January 8th.... awhhh the bliss of that. Lay back and do what I please for 3 whole weeks. :)

It's still snowing.... We've got about a foot and a half of it now. I'm glad it's gone back to the big fluffy ones again... those are my favorite. My psyco snowman is starting to look like some sort of weird marshmellow with all that excess snow on him. LOL.... well this is me saying hej då again.... I'm going out with some friends for a bit. Oh yay.... hehehe... buh bye :)

GOD JUL ALLT DU

A few words after a froidy without jimmoi ... but with someone that we are all glad to see again..

what was my best christmas presant this year ?.. It came early on the faces of my friends, the faces of people that I will never forget... It came with a smile and a hot cup of coffee.. It came and said "dude when do you get off work ?" .. but seriously .. The best gift I could have ever asked for was never wrapped by elves or carried in a magic sled.. there weren't any deer ticks to be found for miles, or any fat guys hopped up on magic dust... Just a few familiar faces, a few familiar smiles.. A hug, a smoke and a few laughes. The best presant under my tree took a year of constant effort. The best presant comes in the memmories I share with each of you of the times we spent together laughing and enjoying life. The times we had to comfort one another when we were hurting. Some of you I have known forever, and some are rather new.. but all the same it doesn't matter, because we shared a bit of our lives together. I can't think of a better gift in life than having spent the last year with you guys...

Merry Christmas, Happy New Year... It will not be our last......... Mike Rigney

it seems the comment system left,
and then came back.
dont know why.
augh. long day today.

expect updates.
something.
funny. hah.

2. _l_o_o_s_e__s_l_u_g_s___.:::ó ••
Saturday, December 16 whell, in not gonna debate on this cus you know i cant type after i come home from wurk, and i have artirithus and my mom is cheep ...
... is kept in James Collin's basement, along with his collection of Sawatzki and Devlin pictures. These episodes are more "adult" then the rest of the ...
... by post'rs of mr swatzski and devlin (his skewl teachers) and proceeded to masterbate to there believed presenc'. -mmmm, devlin, you make me so hot, ...
51% Sun, 02 Dec 2001 00:06:47 GMT http://loose-slugs.com/archives/2000_12_10_archive.html

I would like to know what this is about!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Seriously!!!!!!!!!!!

Never mind, just eliminate me from the board. I don't need to read obscene things about myself.

Wendell G. Henry

Born on Jan. 23, 1981 in Puyallup, WA and passed away on Dec. 16, 2001 in Graham, WA. He was a student at Pierce College, and is survived by his father Glen Henry, mother Colleen (Richard) Landry, sisters Fawn (Virgil) Davis, Kathryn Henry, 2 nieces and 1 nephew. A memorial service will be held at Powers Funeral Home in Puyallup on Friday at 11:00am, and a grave- side service will follow at Woodbine Cemetery.

I miss Wendell. I am furious that the school has not acknowledged his death. Today I gave Mr. Hammond a note asking that he do something, at least tell the teachers because I found out from a student. I hope some of you who knew Wendell can come to the funeral.

I wish there was something that I could say to tell about what a loss his death is but words fail me. He was a kind, sensitive, funny person. Knowing Wendell made me a better person.

Who the hell are all these people? This is why I stopped coming, cause all these people just keep coming and going. Its not the same...

remember...all good children go to heaven

. . .

wow! ( just so there's two posts instead of just one )

oh.
and I was talking to my father and he was complaining about EQ and how that he has had the account for two years and " didnt want to lose it " and I yelled at him - saying it was just a fucking game and he didnt have to put so much effort into it - and he said that he didnt have much of anything else to put his time/effort into.

this is because he is white.
but he did have something.
he had his children - but didnt find them interesting.
never has - dont think he ever will.
I laughed when I came to that conclusion later on.

My family is " broke " this christmas.
I have more monetary suppliments than they do.
So I'm going to " pep up " our celebration this year with a surprise.
hopefully it will get everyone up and at-them.

is anyone up for going to Shari's - or some other " get-to-gether " occasion ( possibly even at my house / kind of like the barbeque only not ) on christmas eve? no need for presents - being here itself would be enough. my grandparents and calvin will be present, although much like thanksgiving we can just ignore them. ah hah. we could play my newly acquire games. I dont know - if you're interested in stopping by - just email me ( notmud@loose-slugs.com ) or call if you have the number. I'd like that. I dont know.

two posts and a whole lot of wasted time.

Where did she go?
I don't quite remember,
Why did she leave?
I don't exactly recall.

I was thinking about writing a song about " Im dumb, white, and got nothing to do with my life "
most of the time I think that I'd have an easier life had I been black.
Then I'd dedicate my life to " FUCK WHITEY " or " THE MAN IS KEEPING ME DOWN " or " THOSE BE MAH NIGGERS "
or then some of the time I think that I'd have had it easier if I were a woman.
And then I would dedicate my life to " WOMEN CAN HAVE SEXUAL FREEDOM " or " DONT OPPRESS ME WITH YOUR PENIS "
but neither of these things apply to me.
I am white. And I have no heritage to speak of. And here I sit. I work at a box factory.
It isnt all that bad - then again - it is quite bleak.
Then what if I were Filipino? I'd dedicate my life to " ISLAND PRIDE " and " WE-S GOT-S TO-S STICK-S TOGETHER(S) "
Being white just seems to be the scape-goat now-a-days.
We are the " lost ones " - nowhere to go and nothing to do about it much anyway.

On the radio this morning I heard that you shouldnt eat bacon.
It might cause cancer.
Oh well.
The second thing you shouldnt eat was aspertane. I dont believe I eat that anyway ( nutrasweet ) - being it tastes like shit.
Then you shouldnt eat margarine.
If you want to know more things you shouldnt eat - try 1 800 592 HEAL
or at least thats what I believe the number was.

I've been thinking about myself - who I have "become" a lot lately.
and I realise I've begun to actually " care " about things. To be ... ah - I use to say it was " human "
Now I just think, as I have always thunk ( ah hah ) - that it is stupid.
I was overly-concerned about bonnie and her boyfriend / and whether I had actually offended the two of them.
Had I been me - instead of being concerned I would just dig myself deeper and laugh all the way down.
I was overly-concerned about bradbury and his seemingly disavowing of those I know, and the board itself.
Had I been me - instead of wanting to email him and see what the problem was - I would not give a shit.
I was overly-concerned about heather and her seemingly " Im sick for james but not for anyone else "
Had I been me - instead of thinking she was avoiding me I'd just not give a shit and continue living my life.
I was overly-concerned about if I was getting " assistant pay " at work - a whopping 15$ instead of the 13$ I get.
Had I been me - instead of concerning myself with fucking money I'd not care. Happy I have a job at all.
and finally -
I was overly-concerned about being overly-concerned about things.
This, I have realised, may be a sign of " chronic stress " - or some other bothersome diagnosis I could take drugs for.
I figured this from a radio commercial that ' more-than-spoke ' to me about stress, and worry.
It pegged me - and then it began to talk about how I could " get better " and " be better " and " not worry so much "
( being that if I took drug so-and-so and dont care about rectal bleeding, violent vomiting, or explosive flatulence )
and I laughed.
I dont want to " get better " and I dont want to " be better "
In fact - the more I think about it,
it seems I was trying to be normal.
to fit in.

fuck that.
fuck caring.
fuck the whole lot of it.

I want to call Rachael and set up a date with her this friday.
but I havent the proverbial balls to go and do so.
I know this is something I'd enjoy putting myself through.
being the masochist that I am.

... you know.
I think I'm just getting burnt out.

Finally, something other than smiley faces ...

Perfect breasts
(o)(o)

Fake silicone breasts
( + )( + )

Perky breasts
(*)(*)

Big nipple breasts
(@)(@)

A cups
o o

D cups
{ O }{ O }

Wonder bra breasts
(oYo)

Cold breasts
( ^ )( ^ )

Lopsided breasts
(o)(O)

Pierced Breasts
(Q)(O)

Hanging Tassels Breasts
(p)(p)

Grandma's Breasts
\ o /\ o /

Against The Shower Door Breasts
( )( )

Android Breasts
| o | | o |

Martha Stewart's Breasts
($)($)

And God created woman, and she had three breasts.
He then asked the woman,"Is there anything you'd like to have changed?"
She replied, "Yes, could get rid of this middle breast?"
And so it was done, and it was good.
Then the woman exclaimed as she was holding the third breast in her hand...
"What can be done with this useless boob?" And God created man. :)

Until today I thought the hardest person to Christmas shop for was my father, I was wrong. I spent three hours in the mall today wondering about a Christmas gift for the bastard I've known longest - James. I hate you James - you're almost impossible to buy shit for. However, after some thought and remembering of 'old times' I found something.

Ever had a drive through experience from hell ? I'm certain you have. Today I was thrown into another one. Driving home from the mall I had the urge for some Taco Bell tacos. The only Taco Bell I knew of was on Pacific Ave. so I made my way there - Hold! Break! Turn right! I spotted a KFC / Taco Bell by Fred Meyers ( however you spell Meyers. ) I turned into the drive through and sat there. Yes I sat in line for 30minutes just to place my damn order. Thirty Minutes! Getting my order was at least another ten minutes. Grandmothers eat jello and play bingo faster than I got my food!

I'm going to watch Titanic now. It's the second part, the first was shown yesterday ( I didnt watch that one ). Today however - she sinks! DeCraprio dies and that extra falls, smacks his head on a railing entertaining me with a loud "Pop" sound. Fun!

Although, I should say - a rather well made movie, very nice ship ( if only by looks not design ), I also wish I had a nude sketch like the one shown. Better yet, I wish I could sketch like that so I wouldn't be stuck with my landscape drawings.

I would only like to say two thing in response to your responce:
First- you call yourself a republican? I would like to ask that in the name of a true republican light you start calling yourself a democrat because that is what you are.
Second- May God have mercy on your soul, and pity on your heart.

Next time you start complaining about how the world is going to hell in a handbasket, take a look at the rhetoric you support.

. . .

*You have now been put on my block list*

Sometimes, it's all I can do to not laugh at these people