March 10, 2004

Bonnie,

I am coming back to visit for Spring Break [next Monday - Friday].

I never discounted the relativity of my post, and even when writing it, I knew it would generate such a response. Whether the lives of those may be fulfilling to themselves is irrelevant. How can I see if someone else's life if fulfilling? You may ask this, or you may not; but, the question still remains. It doesn't rely on such fascinations as "dreams" or "reason." Fulfilling is making an active change to make something of yourself, and, not so much as setting a goal, but settings standards that you don't want your life to fall below.

Someone can dream of becoming something or someone, but you may want to ask yourself some questions before hand such as: "Why?" "How will this help me set my standards?" or "How will my predisposed vision change once I reach this point?"

I've set such standards to make my life fulfilling for now:
Don't eat meat (been a Vegetarian for 7 months)
Don't sleep around (been in a serious relationship for 5 months)
Never work at a factory again
Stay in school for 8 years
Study and theorize about art and music
Form a musical alliance with Aaron
Work on music -- develop new styles and techniques.
Work to survive and maintain my place in society (i.e. - not depend on my parents or relatives to give money for rent or school -- Walgreens One Hour Photo Lab niggerz!)
Make rational decisions and maintain a rational frame of mind

There are more, but lastly...

Take time out from all of this to: relax, drink, smoke pot, fuck.

- Jesse

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